Pepperoni Pizza on the BBQ Grill

Is there anything more manly than cooking over an open fire?  Ok, maybe killing lions with your bare hands. But grilling is up there on the man-o-meter.  And grilling a turkey pepperoni pizza is infinitely less dangerous than hand-to-hand combat with large, predatory cats.  Plus it's more humane.  Unless you're a turkey that is.

Do I get to have some pizza too?

It's also a great way to score brownie points with the ladies.  Devin seemed to enjoy it.  And if you wasn't sick as a dog I'm sure I'd be bathing in money, love, and power...but she's sick and will forget about the pizza by the time she's better.

So, if there's currently little to nothing in it for me, why make this pizza and not just call Papa Johns? 

F Papa Johns.  That's why.

Plus, you're gonna pay a ton of money for a crummy pie from a pizza joint.  Little Ceasars has the $5.55 pizzas that taste pretty terrible, and anything you get anywhere else is gonna cost you $10-$12 and probably taste about as good as the carpet my dog sleeps on.

If you give me a minute, I'll put a topping on it

So what do you do?  It's fairly easy. Here's what you need:

2 cups of bread flour + extra (up to another cup)
1.5 pkg of active dry yeast (Fleischmann has got a pizza yeast that I tend to use)
2 tsp. kosher salt
2 Tbsp olive oil + extra
2 Tbsp sugar
1 Tbsp honey
2/3 -1 cup of lukewarm water + additional for kneading process

You'll notice quite a bit of additionals in here, and there's good reason. I've found that pizza dough all depends on humidity, temperature, moisture of your flour, how active your yeast is, etc...it can be a guessing game, but it's like guessing how many hands a person has...it's usually two, but sometimes you can be surprised.

Wrong again...

This is infinitely easier with a big ole Kitchenaid Stand Mixer...but since you're a guy, most likely you're like me and don't have one.  Or you're poor like me and can't afford one.  I'd recommend a hand mixer, but since mine got burnt up during the making of this post, I'd recommend using it only during the first cup of flour.  After that, the dough gets too heavy and you'll bust your motor.

Here's what to do:

The yeast (1.5 pkgs), the 2 Tbsp sugar, and 1/3 cup of water go into a large mixing bowl.  Nuke your honey for about ten seconds and squeeze in your Tbsp of that, too.  Whisk (or just mix...or use your hand mixer) this stuff until its all dissolved.

After about ten minutes you'll get a nice head on top of the liquid, like a terribly bready-smelling beer. This is when you start adding some goodness.  Get your mixer going and slowly add 1 cup of your bread flour.  Before you finish adding the flour, add your 2 tsp kosher salt and the 2 Tbsp olive oil. 

At this point, let this mixure benefit from the electric mixer.  It'll save you some kneading time, and will help build some big time gluten, which will make for a very stretchy pizza dough.  While it's mixing, go ahead and add the other 1/3 cup of water. 

After a few minutes, you should have what looks like very sticky pancake batter.  Start sprinkling in the next cup of bread flour.  Once the mixture starts getting heavy and your mixer starts slowing down, turn the mixer off and begin mixing by hand.  You're basically kneading at this point.  Just let the dough incorporate as much of the flour as it wants.  When it stops being sticky, you know you've got enough flour in. 

It may take the whole 2 cups, it may take less.  I added a bit more water this past batch, and it soaked up almost a full cup extra.  This sounds stupid, but listen to the dough. 

You're done kneading when the dough softens.  It's one of those things that you just know it's happened.  Anywhere between 7 minutes and 20 minutes of kneading is needed (get it?) to get your dough to this point.

Loose as a goose

What's next?  Get a bit of olive oil back into your mixing bowl and shape your dough into a ball.  Roll said ball in your oiled mixing bowl and cover the bowl with a sheet of saran wrap. Tuck this away for an hour somewhere warm.  A sunny window is nice.  I tend to go for the oven after I preheat the broiler for about 30 seconds.  You want it warm enough to make you sweat, but not hot enough to melt your plastic wrap. 

Think San Fernando Valley in the summer.

After and hour, your dough will have proofed, and more than DOUBLED in size...

Should I add the topping now?

Notice the gigantism that has affected the dough.  Turn this out onto an olive oil lubed cookie sheet - this will make for easy transportation later. 

This would also be a good time to preheat your grill.  I use a Char-Broil two burner propane machine. You're more than welcome to use something as big or as small as you'd like.  I hear this is good on charcoal grills, too.  But condo complexes aren't the best place for Fireball Jr... You hear me next door neighbors?

Safer than cooking with a pet dragon

So, back to the dough on the cookie sheet. You're gonna stretch the dough out.  If your dough isn't stretchy enough, it's okay to roll it out, but you'll score more points (and have a better dough) if you can stretch it out real thin.  You can even toss it like you see on TV.  But when you drop it, make sure the girl doesn't see it, or you'll have to start all over.

Once you get it the size you want it, make sure both sides have a light brushing of olive oil and head out to the grill.  This would also be the time to grab your toppings.  I did turkey pepperoni and Mozzarella cheese, but the photos I took were when I did Mexican cheese and ground beef.  A basic sauce is useful.  Dried herbs are optional - Basil and Oregano are my favorites.

Things you'll need at the grill:

Your dough
Olive oil in a small cup
Brush
Toppings
Tongs and spatula

Awesomeness is often mistaken for toppings

Flip your dough onto the grill (which you'll turn your burners to low, so you don't burn the crust).  You may worry about the dough falling through the grate, but the second it hits the hot metal, it'll kinda solidify. 

Low heat = no char

The edges maybe fold over, but a lift with the tongs will keep them level.  It'll bubble and hiss (the oil will pop).  Put the lid down and let it cook for a minute or two.   It should look like this when you lift the lid.

Bubbles = flavor

Brush the top with some of your olive oil and get ready for the quickness.  Flip it over with your tongs and spatula and once again brush with olive oil. 

Grill marks = grilled pizza

A bit of sauce on the top, sprinkle with cheese and the pepperoni.

Grilled pizza = manly

Lower the lid and cook until the bottom browns and the cheese melts.  Once you're there, slide that bad boy onto your cookie sheet and slice it up.  This is what mine looked like:

Heaven from the fire

Now go put the brownie points to use, buddy.